Been a little tied up at work but I didnāt forget you. Hopefully Iāll have it done later today.
no rush, man. iām not exactly usain bolt
And now back to our regularly scheduled program.
āNot such a square after all, and I like how you try to stand tall as if youāre the law, yet still pride goeth before the fall.ā
āIt seems weāre well versed in each otherās reputation, Iām flattered by your consideration, and this information gives me a greater sensation for the decapitation of your whole organization, although thatās an exaggeration considering you, Dawood and Vanya are not exactly of one nation.ā
āAt least up front, you looked like the brightest of the runts, but each of you pulled the exact same stunt hiring that Kashmirian grunt who makes you look like a team of cunts. You donāt need the Pope to tell you thatās a slippery slope, heās too much of a dope to even know how to adjust his fucking sniper scope!ā
āI may have caught a pen in one of my eyes, yet I simply arise, while you were taken by surprise and fell to your demise with a simple barber disguise. Itās past time for you to disperse, because like a living curse, your next verse aināt good enough to put me in a hearse.ā
yeah, i aināt topping that.
āDouble oh no! Itās another low blow from the Costco version of a store brand bond foe. Uh oh, an overblown ego! Iāll teach you ābout humility and how to go YOLO.ā
āYour next lesson then, inside the lionās den, this time by the sword rather than a fountain pen. Do I offend? I highly recommend when youāre taking notes you keep an eye out for the sharpe end.ā
āYou cannot recognise all of my grand designs; put my life on the line; my beliefs are well defined. Iām immortalised where you only live twice. Your lack of moral backbone coincides with your right eye.ā
āMight I ask: whatās your legacy, other than a boring ass greek tragedy of wandering restlessly, deathlessly, without any destiny, a poor manās take on a white bread Baron Samedi?ā
āAnd sure, while I canāt hurt you fatally, your deathās falsity is of benefit to me. So go ahead and live on endlessly, keep on coming at me, all I need to win is to leave you as an amputeeeeee.ā
How about Alexa Carlisle vs Sierra Knox?
That was pretty fucking good actually. The immortalized line, the Baron Samedi and the ending caught me by surprise. And I think I have to agree with Heisenberg about you winning the first round, but Iāll leave the match for the jury to decide. A battle well fought my friend.
- The Undying (Naz)
- The Ghost (Meat)
0 voters
Sure but Itāll be a little while before I can jump in, and Heisenberg been waiting so Iād like to let him go next. What do you think of the past matches so far?
Take as much time as you want. So far itās been pretty good.
I think I can play Sierra, but Iād like Alexa to go first.
ah, cheers, man. itās always a pleasure reading your work.
Yeah, @Screaming_Meat takes round 2 as well. That bit in the middle got off the rhyming scheme a little bit, but the rest of it had great flow, decent burns, and a serious amount of underlying sass about it. @Nazarethās got an unparalleled rhyming ability, but thatās not enough for victory this time. Kale for the win across two battles. Leaves you both 2/2 since I started following.
As for me, I need someone to go first. Iāve never rapped before and what I have in mind will require me playing defense. So, whoever wants to step up, bring it. Remember, Iām Ort-Meyer.
cheers, man. i think i have a short attention span.
Your opponent is Imogen Royce.
Iām about half way finished with my verse now but I thought you should get a heads up.
An excellent choice! Sheās actually my favorite target of the trilogy; her name, her appearance, her design, her backstory, and that sheās competing with Hush for title of biggest bastard employed by ICA (although Hush is beating her at that one). And sheāll go perfect with the scheme Iāve been tinkering with. Challenge accepted!
āAh, from what I gather of my estimative and derivative architect, youāre of the limitive primitive intellect, now I fully know what to expect, how to deflect and dissect your rhyming defects and mere grade school projects and clone rejects which are most at effect in feeding insects.ā
āMy algorithms predicts human behavior in the ICAās favor and is a money saver, this practically means Iām the new Professor Xavier, so naturally you should just waiver and factually submit to your new slaver. Taking control of your soul merely requires me to understand your role, slightly shift the goal, and as whole, Iāll have you walking over hot coals on your bare soles.ā
āYour participation in genetic manipulation has caused countless complications, needless situations that lead to your employment termination and eventual eradication by your own creation, like a personal damnation for your own humiliation.ā
āDespite all testaments to my superb mental prevalence and excellence compared to your negligence and irrelevance, you wonāt be treated with benevolence, only the malevolence as your hit from my lyrical pestilence.ā
I based the rap on how she generally speaks, so I may have went a bit overboard.
Wake up, wake up, my friend, itās the dawn of a new day,
You have things to do, now itās time to play.
You seem a bit young to have hair near-gray,
Spending all your time slaving for ICA,
Too focused on work to even collect your pay,
Iām surprised your first line wasnāt more clichĆ©,
Like āMy name is Imogen, and Iām here to say.ā
I will guide and teach you, and you will learn by doing,
So try some real rapping, not that meaningless spewing.
Youāre an Agency cow, just standing there mooing,
Ignoring your duties and always eschewing
Your employeesā needs, theyāre lined up and queuing
For you to end their employment upon closer viewing,
But youāll be lucky if all they resort to is suing
Your ass off from the anger in which theyāre all stewing.
I spent my life building the perfect man,
The ultimate weapon for the Hidden Hand.
You couldnāt even take the time to go get a tan,
Just blindly followed your inferior plan.
My perfect creation was designed to kill,
A lifetime of training and unrivaled skill.
Your only fixation was controlling free will,
All your deeds, your whole life amounting to nil.
You treat your employees like they were just pests,
But youād never make it through even one of my tests.
You think youāre so special with all your research,
But Hush had you beat, you couldnāt even besmirch.
Your Star Trek looks and your smug-sounding voice
Donāt make you a worthy target, Miss Royce.
So Iām sorry Imogen, but youāve got no game,
Just another plain target, youāre all just the same.
No lasting impression, no longevity,
No reason to replay, just a dead legacy.
There wasnāt even a contract to make you expire,
What makes you think you can step to Ort-Meyer?
My chapter was legendary, thereās none to compare,
I had a fucking asylum on top of my lair!
Iām the primary villain, Iām the Hitman emcee,
The face of the franchise owes his glory to me!
When it comes to this series Iām the original baddie,
So welcome home, bitch. Heeeeereās Daddy!
Ok, so to provide the first bit of criticism myself; it is very clear that Iām an amateur at this. All of my rapping experience comes from 2+ years of watching reaction videos to Epic Rap Battles of History, and it shows. The flow switched up multiple times, there was a whole lot of flexing involved, the third and fourth bits are really filler thatās just there to pad out the length, with the first two and the last one being the real meat. Having acknowledged those shortcomings myself, have at me. Howād I do?
I know I started this thread but Iām no pro at this either. I just listen to mostly rap music and canāt see myself doing this anywhere else. I agree with the filler part but overall your verse is fire. And it feels in character for Ort-meyer to flex. Both he and Royce have a similar god complex in my opinion. Looking forward to more battles with you.
Alright, glad to know itās not too shabby. I think Iāll refrain from analyzing yours this time, as Iām the competition this round, though I will say that I couldnāt hope to match your rhyming. So, if youād like to put up the poll, I guess it falls to @Screaming_Meat to make the comparisons and predict a winner this time around.
Okay folks, mad scientists engineer VS analysis pioneer!
- Royce (Naz)
- Ort-Meyer (Berg)
0 voters