Elden Ring has a fuck ton of bosses, too much for me to rank em properly like i would with other games. So I’m reviewing every boss in Elden Ring that has an achievement (except for Godfreys Apparition ,Mohg the Omen and Royal Knight Loretta as they are inferior versions of later fights). I’ll be reviewing them in order of when I fought them rather than the order of the achievement list. I will also be reviewing Radagon of the Golden Order and Elden Beast despite not having beaten them yet. I’ve fought them a fair few times and got a good feeling for the fight. I just didn’t beat it yet due to wanting to finish this game with friends.
Margrit The Fell Omen, Score: 7.3/10
God, Margit is such a great fight even after 80 more hours of the lands between. He’s obviously a weakened Morgott with less tricks up his sleeve but his slow swipes, switch-ups and ethereal hammer in phase 2 still make for an awesome memory of this fight. He probably also killed me the most, with the exception of Malenia, which showed me this wasn’t Dark Souls 3 i was dealing with. What a great introductory boss to the “story bosses”,
Leonine Misbegotten, Score: 4/10
This boss gets my base points of 3/10 with 1 pity point due to the first encounter with him. First time fighting through the really quite difficult castle morne and facing this new foe on a secluded island in a great looking arena was a fantastic experience. Then i saw him again in a dungeon, then again in some mining cave, then again in some catacombs and then as a regular enemy. And at the end of the game hes just nothing, my memory of this boss has been overwritten countless time by fighting other variants or crushing him under my greatswords in 4 hits as an enemy. which is a shame as his moves are actually really fun at the lower levels and his design is good. but alas, he was meant to be fodder in the end.
Godrick the Grafted, Score: 9/10
If this boss didn’t get fucked by fromsoft and had his first phase severed and put in an evergaol this would be an absolute 10 out of 10. Despite being referred to as the runt of the litter and the weakest of the demigods, Godrick puts up one hell of a fight for the early game, with varied but fair attacks that have some great style to them. Then halfway through the fight you get one of the best mid boss cutscenes out of any game. That absolute beast of a scream will never leave my mind. which moves you onto an amazing second phase. Fantastic design, fantastic fight, extremely memorable, Godrick’s got it all, he’s no runt of the litter.
Red Wolf of Radagon, Score: 6.5/10
Despite this good dog being used as an enemy later in the siofra river well, that isn’t the reason it’s got such a low score. No, no, no, my problem with this undersized Sif clone is that it’s a glass cannon that’s too easy to shatter. To the point where the tight debate hall he’s in poses more of a threat to you than the boss itself. As the tightness of the room will limit your rolls from his magic attacks and sweeping sword strikes. The design itself is also a bit bland but it’s cool he can combo you even though it feels like bullshit sometimes.
Renalla, Queen of the Full Moon, Score: 8.3/10
Elden ring has this fantastic habit of making gimmick bosses not absolute push-overs, Renalla being the first like this. Having a first phase be the ultimate conclusion of the Prowling Magus and Congregation concept is fucking incredible. the scenery, the atmosphere, the flying books. Its great and i enjoyed it alot, but when that phase change hit and it turned into this incredible magical and beautiful battle i knew i would fucking love this boss. It’s too bad her poise is lower than the int on my character. Because if she had the second phase would’ve been more engaging than it is now.
Starscourge Radahn, Score: 10/10
For the record, I fought pre-patch Radahn. Also yea, call me a basic bitch but Radahn rules. The great festival of war as the set up, that awesome introductory cutscene, the lore behind everything and then going to war with a small army of summons. And then when you think the awesomeness is over he turns himself into a meteorite as a start to the second phase. When I first saw that it blew my mind. His fight is also really fun due to him actually being quite slow with the exceptions of some spells. And his design is top tier. What an unforgettable fight for the great General Radahn, Mightiest demigod of the shattering.
Loretta, Knight of the Haligtree/Royal Knight Loretta, Score: 7/10
Its weird for me to lump both the first version from Carian manor and the much improved version from Haligtree in the same spot. As though the Haligtree version is much better with a greatly expanded moveset and better visual grandeur, I have much better memories of learning the Carian manor phantom version. Either way, Loretta is a much better Tree Sentinel variation than the Draconic Tree Sentinel. Using beautiful looking magic and a huge sickle for a pretty fun fight that can drag with her slightly too large health bar.
Mimic Tear, Score: 5/10
Objectively, this is a middle of the road bossfight that could’ve been way better if the concept had been expanded upon but subjectively it’s one of my favorites due to the simple concept of: Hey it’s you! But in retrospect the fight should have been a bit harder and not cheesable as I see many people now do in videos.
Godskin Noble, Score: 8.5/10
Beware of plump sort ahead. I have a feeling everyone on the interwebs hates fighting the godskins. so it always feels weird when i fight one and I’ve got great fun doing it. The nobles are the lesser of the two but they’re still fantastic. They have an amazing mix of strong slow attacks and fast pokes and sweeps with an awesome second phase that really emphasizes their plumpness. Their second phase roll for a millennia years can be annoying and their input reads are a bad design choice on any boss that has input reads but the Fantastic visual and combat design endures through and through.
Godskin Apostle, Score: 9/10
The only boss that didn’t get an achievement that i’m still ranking ‘cause his fat brother did get an achievement related to him. But yea, the much slimmer Godskin Apostle is the Godskin i like fighting the most. Their design is superb, their second phase doesn’t have one awfully tedious attack to dodge and every move is fair and fun to weave in and out of. Too bad about that input read black fireball.
Rykard, Lord of Blasphemy, Score: 10/10
The PERFECT spectacle fight. The design, immaculate. The voice, beyond memorable. the literally bringing you to the depths of hell for a 3d bullet hell experience, fucking incredible. I’ve got nothing bad to say about my boy Praetor Rykard.
Magma Wyrm Makar, Score: 4.5/10
I would try to judge this boss on how it fights more than how it looks but I have a feeling I never really fought a magma wyrm, I just swung my swords near its general vicinity and it died. It’s design is rad though and when it’s second phase happens I actually see him properly and have a decent enough fight.
Ancestor Spirit/Regal Ancestor Spirit, Score: 5.7/10
The first time doing the Ancestor Spirit, I was enamored like most people but the fight felt too easy so I didn’t really enjoy it. The remembrance version, Regal Ancestor Spirit quenched my need for a difficult version by way of self heal. Though I like self heal on bosses like Malenia. I think it’s a very poor fit here, especially how it is done. The big aoi feels really inconsistent in how much it heals the boss and it also comes out too infrequently to feel consistent. The new attacks and moves do up the boss a bit.
Valiant Gargoyles, Score: 6.7/10
This was decently fun, a lot of people complained about the “gank” bosses of elden ring but I never disliked them. Wasn’t super fond of them but they weren’t hair pullingly bad or frustrating in my opinion. Gargoyles was a bit of shit show though, on their own I’m not a fan of them. And together they didn’t fare much better. The fight went decently though and I got a rhythm for the duo despite the fact they are obviously not tuned to be together. And hey their design rocks and so do their animations.
Astel, Naturalborn of the void, Score: 8.5/10
A reuse of this boss? Happening at this time of the year, In this part of the country, Localized entirely within a snowy mine!? Yes. May i know why? No. If Astel, Stars of Darkness didn’t exist this boss would go up an entire point. But the fact that this awesome exclamation point to a fantastic quest down and down the rotted underground of this world got reused without a care in the world is one of the only reuses that genuinely pisses me off. The design is beyond cool and the fight is an amazing back and forth with fantastic visuals.
Morgott, The Omen King, Score: 8.7/10
Wake up, remember Mohg is your twin brother. Cry on your shitty wooden throne. The true Margrit fight and what a fight it is. The increased aggressiveness, the cooler looking new moves, the returning old moves with a twist, the fantastic arena and that gaddamn beauty of an opening cutscene. Even though I had my suspicions that Morgott wasn’t the penultimate boss of elden ring, it damn well sure felt like he was.
Elemar Of the Briar, Score: 6/10
The really good looking reskin of the Bell-Bearing Hunter is put in a cramped room that puts his move-set and abilities at a disadvantage but ultimately makes the fight more fun for the player. Which is nice, I really dislike fighting the ballbag hunter out in the wild, with his bullshit alakazam sword. Here he’s a decent but ultimately forgettable close range duel with some fun effects.
Lichdragon Fortissax, Score: 7.7/10
If this guy wasn’t a reskin of the ancient dragons you can find in altus plateau and crumbling farum azula he would have such a higher score. Because Fortissax rocks, his moves are fun to dodge, his head is a nice weak spot, he has a built in defense against hugging his back legs and his second phase is an amazingly fun spectacle. The area is great and the overall tone is amazing, but due to seeing his kind a bit too often he’s just diminished despite looking different enough. I also dislike the camera heavily on this fight but the camera has always been an issue on dragon fights.
Dragonkin Soldier of Nokstella, Score: 6/10
The best thing about this guy is the Incantation you get from him. Otherwise its another Magma Wyrm situation where you just hit something you can’t properly see until it dies, his second phase is kinda cool and his arena is drop dead gorgeous but that doesn’t really save the boss.
Commander Niall, Score: 7.5/10
I feel like one of those contrarian internet critics when I have fond memories of this fight. At Least, the part without the phantoms, i fucking love this guy and his electric peg leg attacks, with the small arena really encouraging proper dodging and timed dodges. If this guy had more variety in his attacks and his first phase wasn’t a rip off commander o’neill he would’ve been so much greater.
Fire Giant, Score: 8/10
Another spectacular spectacle fight/endurance fight. This fight is beautiful, from the location, to the attacks to the design of the giant itself. not much to say otherwise other than that i just really love this fight…
Malenia, Blade of Miquella, Goddess of Rot, Score: 8.3/10
Again, i feel like a contrarian for liking this fight, my biggest problems with it are waterfowl dance and as of 1.4 air healing on summons. The rest of the fight I think is a very difficult but very fun dance of dodge, attack, dodge attack at extremely high speeds. Malania is also visually excellent and her lore is amazing
Mohg, Lord of Blood, Score: 8.5/10
Wake up, remember Morgott is your twin brother. DON’T CARE CAUSE MUH DYNASTYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. GET FUCKEN MOHGEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. I Am so sad Mohg is so easy because god i love this blood bullet hell through and through. The good thing about him being easy means I get a funny anecdote on how my controller disconnected at the start of the fight and even with him getting me nearly down to death I still beat him on the first try. I also dislike that his first phase is severed and put in the sewers, it works for margrit but not for Mohg imo.
Godskin Duo, Score: 7/10
I didn’t want to mention the Godskin OST in the single fights as here it really shines. The fight however does not, I’m wondering why in the sweet hell the godskins have a shared health bar, but also a separate health bar that isn’t linked up properly so they just respawn making this fight an absolute joke after you killed both or even one of them. The fattie and the leany also don’t work as well together as I’d hoped. But still yer fighting two of the best boss types in the game and you cannae complain about that.
Beast Clergyman,Maliketh the Black Blade, Score: 8/10
I was really surprised when I passed through the fog wall of this boss only to be met by my buddy Gurranq, the beast clergyman. Then I got him to half health and it turns out he’s a goddamn furry who uses the rune of death as a sword. It feels so weird hearing people say he’s one of the toughest challenges while I just clicked with both of his phases and did him in one try. I love his animations, especially in phase 2, where one of the attacks sees him doing a flying projectile attack followed by him jumping on and off his black blade like a pogo stick. What a fight.
Godfrey, First Elden Lord, Hoarah Loux, Warrior, Score: 9.5/10
It’s funny to me that in the last few mandatory bosses there’s 3 close together that all have radically different second phases from their first. Godfrey/Hoarah Loux is one of those and man does it help the fight. As Godfrey it’s a phase where you just get a fun duel with a lot of shockwaves and fun axe moves like his apparition earlier in the game. But then in phase 2 he releases the beast and goes full hulk hogan on your ass, making him far more aggressive and giving him a bunch of really fun moves to dodge and weave through. His earthshaker is also probably one of my favorite moves to dodge in the game. It also helps that his cutscenes and designs are fucking incredible.
Dragonlord Placidusax, Score: 9/10
This might be a contender for my new favorite dragon fight. Again, I really clicked with Placidusax so he wasn’t too difficult. But man is this guy an amazing fight. I had a really good position during most of the fight where I could see what moves he was winding up but I was also in a safe enough position to do proper damage. His second phase start with him turning into a stormcloud only for him to rush out with lightning claws was beyond cool. and His lore, visual design and arena were all top notch.
Radagon of the Golden Order, Elden Beast, Score: 7.5/10
Visually Radagon and Elden Beast are 10/10. Radagon being a goddamn reference to the reveal trailer with the main menu theme remix blasting in the background while he does all his fancy schmancy moves is so incredibly cool and his intro cinematic reveal of him being marika is fucking fantastic. And then elden beast swoops in with an even cooler design and cinematic and starts swimming around the arena like the goddamn loch ness monster. Spewing golden blasts all over. Sadly the fight for both of them is less fun, my biggest issue with both is that the downtime between them attacking and you fighting back is way too big. With Radagon this happens because he teleports too much in his second phase and with elden beast you have the problem of him swimming to the other side of the arena. But in the end the visual spectacle and intermittent moments of fun do save this fight from going below a 7.
